THE POEMThe hair brush, bare skin, doth impart
The most atrocious sort of smart
You grovel full of dread suspense
Waiting for it to commence
And suddenly a loud report
Of a sharp and wicked sort
Sets twenty thousand nerve ends blazing
In a matter most amazing
While full of horrified surprise
The second Red Hot Spank arrives
And one more awful tender spot
Is indescribably Hot
Your mind in panic and despair
Is sure it's more than you can bear
But you can very safely bet
You simply ain't felt nothing yet
Oodles more will be applied
Before Justice is satisfied
Smack, smack, smack and each well freighted
With punish unmitigated
The first cruel smart will not subside
Until about eight are applied
And then an awful, awful lot
Of naughty skin is awful Hot
And you can howl, yell and entreat
But it is kept at frenzied heat
That busy paddle seems to know
If any spot has ceased to glow
And back there, you've just lots and lots
Of awful tender, wincing spots
And the brush will smack every one
Many times before its done
It's awful to get two or three
In very close proximity
It's awful to fell fresh ones smart
On places rather far apart
And stray on firmly muscled thighs
Provoke most horrible surprise
High up where not padded so well
They are maddening as hell
But this sad fact is very true
On thicker padded portions too
The meanest kind, of all the lot
Seems always the kind you just got
Oh smack, smack, smack, so very heated
Stinging, smarting and repeated
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~From
Mr. Magazine (April 1972)
Letters to the Editor
Dear Sir: I'm sending you a spanking
poem that I thought you might like to
print in the Dear MR. Column.
M.R.F., Missouri